Author of Healing & Wholeness: Complementary
and Alternative Therapies for Mental Health
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Grief Counseling Vs. Grief Therapy


By Dr. Randi Fredricks, Ph.D.

Doctors will often recommend that their patient undergo some sort of group grief counseling to help the grieving process be more bearable. The very act of talking out the various fears, and regrets can bring peace to the patient much more quickly then if they are left to struggle independent from a support network. Patients and their friends and family should feel comfortable to talk about the illness.

During this period the illness if often on the forefront of everyone's thoughts, and most people don't want to talk about it because they are afraid of voicing their fears or of saying the "wrong thing". If one person says something regarding the illness it gives others permission to share what they have been desperately needing or wanting to express. Things that need to be discussed are unfinished business or legal issues, forgiveness, funeral arrangements, wills, or the simple act of saying, "I love you." It is okay to break the ice, but be sensitive to the fact that somebody may not be ready to talk as it may be too painful or frustrating.

Grief Counseling

Grief counseling helps mourners with uncomplicated grief go through the phases of grief (shock, denial, anger, depression, and acceptance). Grief counseling can be provided by professionally trained people, or in self-help groups where bereaved people help other bereaved people. All of these services may be available in individual or group settings. Grief counseling helps the patient and/or mourner accept the loss by talking about him or her. They also help the bereaved to identify and express their feelings and to make decisions about the imminent (or past) death.

Grief counseling helps the survivors to begin new relationships or to help patients with unfinished business before they die. Grief counseling is not just for the patient, but is an important aspect for anyone particularly close to the patient, such as family, that will have to live without them. Occasionally, doctors may suggest personal or recommend someone to grief therapy.

Grief Therapy

Grief therapy is used with people who are experiencing complicated grief. In grief therapy, the mourner talks about the deceased and tries to recognize if he or she is experiencing an expected amount of emotion about the loss.

Grief therapy may allow the mourner to see that anger, guilt, or other negative or uncomfortable feelings can exist at the same time as more positive feelings about the person who died. In grief therapy, six tasks may be used to help the bereaved with accepting the loss. The therapy will help them develop the ability to experience, express, and adjust to painful grief- related changes.

The mourner will also find effective ways to cope with painful changes. Grief therapy will help the mourner to know they can still honor their relationship with the deceased and still move on. The mourner will be encouraged to stay healthy and keep functioning. Therapy will also help the person to reestablish relationships and understand that others may have difficulty empathizing with the grief they experience. Lastly, grief therapy will help the bereaved to develop a healthy image of oneself and the world.

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About the Author

Dr. Randi Fredricks, Ph.D. of San Jose Counseling and Psychotherapy is a psychotherapist and author specializing in the treatment of mental health using integrative medicine and natural therapies. She works with individuals, couples, and families at her office in San Jose, California. Dr. Fredricks' publications include the landmark book Healing & Wholeness: Complementary and Alternative Therapies for Mental Health. No part of this article may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means, including information storage and retrieval systems. Disclaimer: This article is not intended to provide medical advice, diagnosis or treatment. Views expressed here do not necessarily reflect those of Dr. Randi Fredricks as articles often present the published results of the research of other professionals. Copyright © 2012. To cite this article, please use the following citation: Fredricks, R. (2008). Healing & Wholeness: Complementary and Alternative Therapies for Mental Health. Bloomington, IN: Author House.


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The recommendations on this website do not constitute professional advice, substitute for professional treatment, or establish a therapeutic relationship. Dr. Randi Fredricks, Ph.D. of San Jose Counseling and San Jose Psychotherapy is a counselor and psychotherapist in San Jose, California providing counseling, psychotherapy, and therapy for individuals and couples with relationship issues, anxiety, panic attacks, post-traumatic stress disorder, depression, relationship issues, self-esteem, addiction, co-dependency, trauma, abuse, eating disorders, and managing grief and loss. If you search for counseling San Jose, psychotherapy San Jose, psychotherapist San Jose, therapist San Jose, counselor San Jose, couples therapist San Jose, couples counselor San Jose, marriage therapy San Jose, life coach San Jose, career coach San Jose, executive coach San Jose, you can find San Jose Counseling and San Jose Psychotherapy and Dr. Fredricks in San Jose and the Silicon Valley as the leading provider of such services. In addition to serving San Jose, Dr. Fredricks serves Campbell, Los Gatos, Saratoga, Milpitas, Mountain View, Monte Sereno, Cupertino, Scotts Valley, Santa Cruz, Felton, Sunnyvale, Morgan Hill, Fremont, Los Altos, and Gilroy, California.