Codependency is often found in families and couples where someone in the family has a problem with an addiction, such
as alcoholism.
There are many definitions used to talk about codependency today. The original concept of codependency was developed to
acknowledge the responses and behaviors people develop from living with an alcoholic or substance abuser. A number of
attributes can be developed as a result of those conditions.
However, over the years, codependency has expanded into a definition which describes a dysfunctional pattern of
living and problem solving developed during childhood by family rules.
One of many definitions of codependency is: a set of maladaptive, compulsive behaviors learned by family members in
order to survive in a family which is experiencing great emotional pain and stress. Maladaptive refers to a person's
inability to develop behaviors which get needs met and compulsive behaviors are where a person acts against their own
will or conscious desires in which to behave. The sources of great emotional pain and stress in the family or couple are
usually chemical dependency, chronic mental illness, chronic physical illness, physical abuse, sexual abuse, emotional
abuse, divorce, hypercritical or a non-loving environment.
Addiction as a Family Disease
There's the school of thought that addiction and codependency share the same roots. Just as the alcoholic or addict
is addicted to a substance, the codependent is addicted to some person, place or thing, such as the relationship with the
alcoholic or addict. This dynamic is seen more often than not in the immediate family of the addict.
I have over twenty years experience counseling addicts, alcoholics and family members and addressing the needs of Adult
Children of Alcoholics (A.C.A.). As a Registered Addiction Specialist, I can help with family counseling or intervention
when needed. Below are links to articles I wrote about how addiction affects family dynamics.
Growing Up in An Alcoholic Home
Codependency - The Family Illness
The Children of Alcoholics Screening Test (CAST)
Couples Counseling in Recovery
For the couple struggling with the problem of addiction, counseling is as essential as recovery. As a Registered
Addictions Specialist, I have a keen insight into what it takes to help a couple survive addiction and recovery.
Treating a couple with a substance abuse problem can be complex. Even once both partners are in recovery, the work can
be challenging. Without the addiction or codependency to mask underlying problems, repressed issues can emerge.
Still, there is great hope for these couples if they are committed to their recovery. Although it’s common knowledge
that codependency can support the continuance of addiction, couples therapy can actually help to make a partnership
a satisfactory medium for recovery for both the addict and the codependent. I'm cognitive of this fact in
the work I do with couples with alcoholism or addiction.
Strategies for Counseling Couples with Addiction
Couples Counseling and the Codependent
The Pain of Emotional and Verbal Abuse
Getting the Help You Need
With over twenty years of experience with addiction and codependency, I know what it takes to recover from these
devastating illnesses. It takes hard work and perseverance and a good therapist can illuminate the path of recovery.
Some of my most fulfilling moments are when one of my clients express the new happiness they've found in their recovery.
Codependent, codepend, codependency, adult children of alcoholic
For more information, please call me at (408)315-0645 or
contact me online.
Take a Free A.C.A. Screening Test