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Codependency is often found in families and couples where someone in the family has a problem with an addiction, such as alcoholism.

There are many definitions used to talk about codependency today. The original concept of codependency was developed to acknowledge the responses and behaviors people develop from living with an alcoholic or substance abuser. A number of attributes can be developed as a result of those conditions.

However, over the years, codependency has expanded into a definition which describes a dysfunctional pattern of living and problem solving developed during childhood by family rules.

One of many definitions of codependency is: a set of maladaptive, compulsive behaviors learned by family members in order to survive in a family which is experiencing great emotional pain and stress. Maladaptive refers to a person's inability to develop behaviors which get needs met and compulsive behaviors are where a person acts against their own will or conscious desires in which to behave. The sources of great emotional pain and stress in the family or couple are usually chemical dependency, chronic mental illness, chronic physical illness, physical abuse, sexual abuse, emotional abuse, divorce, hypercritical or a non-loving environment.

Addiction as a Family Disease

There's the school of thought that addiction and codependency share the same roots. Just as the alcoholic or addict is addicted to a substance, the codependent is addicted to some person, place or thing, such as the relationship with the alcoholic or addict. This dynamic is seen more often than not in the immediate family of the addict.

I have over twenty years experience counseling addicts, alcoholics and family members and addressing the needs of Adult Children of Alcoholics (A.C.A.). As a Registered Addiction Specialist, I can help with family counseling or intervention when needed. Below are links to articles I wrote about how addiction affects family dynamics.



Growing Up in An Alcoholic Home

Codependency - The Family Illness

The Children of Alcoholics Screening Test (CAST)

Couples Counseling in Recovery

For the couple struggling with the problem of addiction, counseling is as essential as recovery. As a Registered Addictions Specialist, I have a keen insight into what it takes to help a couple survive addiction and recovery.

Treating a couple with a substance abuse problem can be complex. Even once both partners are in recovery, the work can be challenging. Without the addiction or codependency to mask underlying problems, repressed issues can emerge. Still, there is great hope for these couples if they are committed to their recovery. Although it’s common knowledge that codependency can support the continuance of addiction, couples therapy can actually help to make a partnership a satisfactory medium for recovery for both the addict and the codependent. I'm cognitive of this fact in the work I do with couples with alcoholism or addiction.



Strategies for Counseling Couples with Addiction

Couples Counseling and the Codependent

The Pain of Emotional and Verbal Abuse

Getting the Help You Need

With over twenty years of experience with addiction and codependency, I know what it takes to recover from these devastating illnesses. It takes hard work and perseverance and a good therapist can illuminate the path of recovery. Some of my most fulfilling moments are when one of my clients express the new happiness they've found in their recovery.
Codependent, codepend, codependency, adult children of alcoholic
For more information, please call me at (408)315-0645 or contact me online.

Take a Free A.C.A. Screening Test





"When the only tool you have is a hammer, every problem begins to resemble a nail."
Abraham Maslow









"Until you make peace with who you are, you’ll never be content with what you have."
Abigail Van Buren









"You cannot strengthen the weak by weakening the strong."
Abraham Lincoln









"Whenever a warrior decides to do something, he must go all the way, but he must take responsibility for what he does. No matter what he does, he must know first why he is doing it, and then he must proceed with his actions without having doubts or remorse about them."
Carlos Castaneda










"The awakened sages call a person wise when all his undertakings are free from anxiety about results."
Krishna









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This site does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment and is intended for informational purposes only. No therapeutic relationship is established by the use of this site. Randi Fredricks is a Marriage Family Therapist Intern IMF 56610 supervised by Mary Crocker Cook MFC 24835. Randi Fredricks is not licensed with the
California Bureau of Naturopathic Medicine. © 2001-2008 Randi Fredricks All rights reserved.